By Dru Ahlborg, Executive Director BRRC
Bullying continues to impact millions of children each year and the reality that it’s evolving faster than many families can keep up.
Recent data shows that about 1 in 5 students report being bullied, and studies indicate that nearly half of those students fear it will happen again. Even more concerning, cyberbullying and social exclusion have made bullying harder to detect and often more emotionally damaging.
At the Bullying Recovery Resource Center (BRRC), we continue to hear from an increasing number of parents and caregivers here in Colorado and across the country who are searching for answers, support, and hope. One truth remains clear:
Bullying is not about something being “wrong” with the child who is targeted. It is about a harmful choice made by the aggressor.
Who Is Most Likely to Be Targeted?
While any child can be bullied, research continues to show that certain groups of children are more likely to be targeted. Understanding this helps us better protect and support them.
Children who stand out for positive reasons
Kids who are successful, intelligent, creative, or determined are often targeted because they trigger insecurity or jealousy in others.
Children who are more vulnerable or anxious
Youth who are introverted, sensitive, or experiencing stress or depression may be perceived as less likely to defend themselves thus making them targets.
Children who feel isolated
Children with fewer social connections are at greater risk. Research consistently shows that having even one trusted friend can significantly reduce the likelihood of being bullied.
Popular or socially influential youth
Bullying isn’t always about weakness – sometimes it’s about power. Popular students may experience relational bullying like rumors, exclusion, or reputation damage.
Children with noticeable physical differences
Any unique physical trait like height, weight, clothing, or appearance can become a focus for bullying behavior, especially in environments lacking strong adult intervention.
Children with disabilities or medical conditions
Youth with ADHD, autism, learning differences, or medical needs are disproportionately targeted. Inclusive school cultures play a critical role in protecting these children.
LGBTQ+ youth
Data continues to show that LGBTQ+ students experience significantly higher rates of bullying and harassment. Safe, supportive environments are essential.
Children from diverse racial, cultural, or religious backgrounds
Bias-based bullying remains a serious concern and often stems from misunderstanding, stereotypes, or lack of exposure.
Let’s Be Clear: It Is Never the Child’s Fault
Children who are targeted are often told directly or indirectly to change something about themselves. This message is not only wrong – it’s harmful.
No child should ever feel they must change who they are to avoid being bullied.
The responsibility always lies with the child who is choosing to bully and with the adults responsible for addressing it.
Common Myths That Harm Children
Misinformation about bullying can deepen the damage. Let’s address some of the most persistent myths:
“Bullying is just part of growing up.”
It’s not. Bullying is a preventable behavior that causes real harm.
“It makes kids tougher.”
Research shows the opposite. Bullying is linked to increased anxiety, depression, and decreased self-worth.
“Some kids are just born bullies.”
Bullying is learned behavior and it can be unlearned with the right intervention.
“Some kids bring it on themselves.”
No one deserves to be bullied. Ever.
“Telling an adult makes it worse.”
In reality, involving the right adults is one of the most effective ways to stop bullying and many children still stay silent out of fear.
“You’ll always be able to see it.”
Today’s bullying is often subtle: social exclusion, rumor-spreading, online harassment. It can be invisible to adults.
“Ignoring it will make it stop.”
Ignoring bullying often allows it to escalate. Silence can feel like permission to the aggressor.
What Children Need Most From Us
Bullying can leave lasting emotional scars, affecting a child’s sense of safety, identity, and belonging.
That’s why our role as adults is so critical.
We must:
- Listen without judgment
- Take concerns seriously
- Advocate where bullying occurs
- Model empathy and respect
- Act consistently and decisively
At BRRC, we believe that recovery is possible and it begins with being heard, supported, and protected.
Now more than ever, our children need us to step in and not step back.
